Winners and losers from NFL Week 5, plus Lions’ improbable bad luck and Colts-Ravens picks

Welcome to the Monday edition of the Pick Six newsletter!

If I learned one thing over the weekend, it’s that we might need a new name for the sport of football because we can’t keep calling it football after what happened on Sunday. There’s only one position on the field that actually uses their feet and they forgot how to use them in Week 5: Kickers combined to miss 12 field goals AND 12 extra points, which was tied for the most missed extra points ever during a single week in the Super Bowl era. 

For the sport’s new name, I propose “Quall.” It stands for “Quarterback Ball,” because that’s basically what the NFL has turned into. If you need me, I will be trademarking “Quall” so that I can make millions when the NFL decides to change its name to the NQL. 

Anyway, we’ll be talking about the missed kicks plus plenty more in today’s newsletter, so let’s get to the rundown. 

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1. Today’s show: Week 5 winners and losers, plus full recap

It’s Monday, which can only mean one thing: I stayed up until 3 a.m. last night recording a podcast with Will Brinson and Ryan Wilson that touched on everything you need to know about Week 5, and let me just say, it’s probably for the best that you listen. We covered all 14 games from Sunday, although I think the Sunday night game technically counted as a Monday game since it ended on Monday morning due to a weather delay that lasted more than an hour. 

One thing we do every week is hand out our weekly winners and losers from Sunday’s action. For our winners this week, we all went with quarterbacks, which either makes us lazy or brilliant. 

Ryan Wilson

• Winner: Justin Herbert and the Chargers. Herbert was Wilson’s preseason pick to win NFL MVP, so Wilson spent half the podcast bragging about how smart he is after watching Herbert throw for 398 yards and four touchdowns in the Chargers’ 47-42 win over the Browns. It’s not just Herbert though, the entire team looks awesome and the Chargers certainly feel like one of the top-three teams in the AFC.  
• Loser: Urban Meyer and the Jaguars. It’s not often that your head coach is a distraction, but that’s exactly what’s happening in Jacksonville. In their first game since Meyer’s off-the-field gaffe, the Jaguars played like they were distracted in a 37-19 loss to Tennessee. The Jags have now lost 20 straight games, which is the second-longest losing streak in NFL history.

Will Brinson

• Winner: Tom Brady. Brady has been in the NFL for so long that it feels like he’s accomplished everything there is to accomplish, but as it turns out, he actually did something on Sunday that he had never done before. The QB threw for 411 yards and five touchdowns, marking the first time that he’s thrown for five or more touchdowns in a game where he also threw for 400 or more yards. Eating a quinoa-only diet for the past 21 years has clearly been paying off for Brady.
• Loser: Giants coach Joe Judge. Judge isn’t even halfway through his second season on the job and he already looks like he’s in over his head. To make things worse, he’s now going to have to deal with a slew of injuries after Daniel Jones, Saquon Barkley and Kenny Golladay were all forced to leave the game on Sunday. 

John Breech

• Winner: Jameis Winston. America got treated to the full Jameis Winston experience on Sunday. After turning the ball over twice in the first quarter, Winston rebounded with a monstrous game that included a 72-yard TD pass and a 49-yard Hail Mary just before halftime. In the before times, if Winston turned the ball over twice, his team would lose by 30 points, but Sean Payton has him playing at such a high level that he doesn’t think twice when he makes a mistake. Winston’s QB rating for season is 108.1, which is basically tied with Tom Brady (108.5), which clearly confirms that Winston is the next Brady. 
• Loser: Kickers. On a historically bad day, kickers around the league combined to miss 24 kicks (12 extra points and 12 field goals). The 12 missed extra points tied the record for most missed PATs in a single week in the Super Bowl era. The Packers‘ win over the Bengals had the most missed kicks with the two teams combining for six misses (five field goals, one extra point).  

Not only did we list our winners and losers, but we also recapped every game from Sunday. To listen to today’s episode — and to subscribe to the best daily NFL podcast out there — be sure to click here. You can also WATCH today’s episode on YouTube by clicking here. 

2. Week 5 grades: Bills get an ‘A+’ for upset win over Chiefs

Every week I team up with six of my colleagues here at CBSSports.com to hand out grades, and this week, the Bills got an A+ for going into Arrowhead and destroying the Chiefs. 

Here’s a look at the grades from two notable games that were played Sunday:

Bills 38-20 over Chiefs (Click here for full recap)

• Chiefs takeaway: This might have been the worst game of Patrick Mahomes‘ career. The Chiefs quarterback turned the ball over three times, including a pick-six, and because of his struggles, the Chiefs just seemed out of sync all night. Not only did the Chiefs lose, but to add insult to injury, they also had multiple players get banged up including Clyde Edwards-Helaire (knee), Tyreek Hill (knee), Travis Kelce (stinger) and Joe Thuney (fractured hand). Grade: D
• Bills takeaway: If your quarterback outplays Patrick Mahomes, that usually means you’re going to beat Kansas City and Josh Allen outplayed the Chiefs star on Sunday night. Allen totaled 374 yards and four touchdowns in the win. Of that total, 315 yards and three touchdowns came through the air. The Bills also got some surprising help from Dawson Knox, who finished with 117 yards and a TD. Buffalo’s defense also came up big, forcing four turnovers, including a pick-six by Micah Hyde that basically iced the game in the third quarter. The Bills are starting to look like the best team in the AFC. Grade: A+

Falcons 27-20 over Jets (Click here for full recap)

• Jets takeaway: Apparently, the Jets’ defense didn’t make it through customs, because it definitely didn’t show up for the first half in this London game. For that matter, neither did the offense. The Jets were buried in a 20-3 hole at halftime and that mostly had to do with the fact that the Falcons were able to pile up more than 250 total yards through the game’s first two quarters. Atlanta’s Cordarrelle Patterson almost had as many yards (76) at halftime as the entire Jets offense (80). The Jets did mount a spirited comeback in the second half, but it was too little, too late. Grade: C-
• Falcons takeaway: Falcons rookie Kyle Pitts decided to hold his NFL coming-out party in London. With the Falcons missing their top two receivers, the first-year tight end had a career day with nine catches for 119 yards and a TD. His day was possible because Matt Ryan was on fire, throwing for 342 yards and two touchdowns. Defensively, the Falcons took advantage of an inept Jets offense, allowing just 230 yards, which was the fewest yards the team has allowed in a regular-season game since 2014. Grade: B+

As for the other 24 grades we handed out on Sunday, you can check those out by clicking here. 

3. Quarterbacks get banged up in Week 5

It’s been awhile since we’ve had to do a roundup of quarterback injuries, but we need one today and that’s because multiple quarterbacks got banged up over the weekend. 

Here’s a look at who went down and what they’re dealing with:  

• Joe Burrow taken to hospital following loss to Packers. The Bengals quarterback suffered a throat contusion at some point on Sunday and it was serious enough that he had to be taken to the hospital after the game. Burrow took a huge hit in this game while scrambling, but that’s not when the injury happened. According to Pro Football Talk, Burrow was poked in the throat at some other point in the game. Burrow has said that he feels fine and he was able to finish Sunday’s game, so I’d say that bodes well for his chances of playing this week against the Lions. 
• Daniel Jones carted off the field in loss to Cowboys. The Giants quarterback had to be carted off the field after suffering a concussion on a vicious hit at the goal line. Jones will have to make it through concussion protocol before he’ll be eligible to play this week, so there’s no guarantee he’ll be on the field against the Rams in Week 6.  
• Tom Brady dealing with thumb injury. The Buccaneers QB showed up to his postgame press conference with his thumb taped up. Brady admitted that he injured his thumb during the game, although the injury probably isn’t that serious, because if it was going to keep him out, he probably wouldn’t have showed up to his press conference and talked about it. 
• Russell Wilson eyeing Week 10 return. After Wilson underwent surgery on his finger, the initial belief was that the quarterback would be out for six to eight weeks, but apparently, he’s working with a different timeline. According to multiple reports, Wilson is hoping to miss just four weeks. Under that timeline, Wilson would miss games against the Steelers (Week 6), the Saints (Week 7) and the Jaguars (Week 8) before returning to practice in Week 9. The good news for Wilson is that the Seahawks have a bye that week, so Wilson wouldn’t have to be back on the field until Seattle’s Week 10 showdown with the Packers, which means the middle finger on his throwing hand will have had more than five weeks to fully heal before he would have to play. 

4. Five crazy facts from Week 5

Every Sunday night, I get an email from our research department here at CBS Sports, and every Sunday, that email always includes some amazingly wild facts about the games that were just played. 

With that in mind, here are five crazy facts about Week 5: 

• Browns make history, but not the good kind of history. The Browns became the first team in NFL history to lose a game where they scored 40 or more points and had zero turnovers. Going into Week 5, NFL teams had been 401-0 in those situations in the Super Bowl era. 
• Jaguars lose their 20th straight game. The Jaguars became just the second team in NFL history to lose at least 20 straight games. The only longer streak came 45 years ago when the Buccaneers lost 26 straight during a streak that spanned 1976 and 1977. The Jaguars could tie that record in Week 11 against the Falcons.  
• Bad luck Lions. The Lions became the first team in NFL history to lose multiple games in the same season on a field goal of 50 or more yards as time expired. Two weeks after losing to the Ravens on a Justin Tucker 66-yard field goal, the Lions lost to the Vikings on a 54-yard kick on Sunday. To put this in perspective: The Lions have two of these losses through five weeks. Before this year, no team had ever had two in an ENTIRE season. 
• Chargers explode in fourth quarter. For as long as I can remember, the Chargers were usually a team that melted down in the fourth quarter, but not anymore. The Chargers scored 26 points in the fourth quarter against the Browns, which is the most points they’ve scored in the game’s final quarter since 1991. 
• Cardinals off to best start in 47 years. The Cardinals are 5-0, which is something that almost never happens. The Cards’ hot start marks the first time since 1974 that the team has started a season at least 5-0. Of course, this year’s team probably doesn’t want to emulate that 1974 team. That season ended with the Cards going 5-4 down the stretch to finish 10-4. That team also lost its opening playoff game. 

If the Cardinals want to improve to 6-0, they’re going to have to fly across the country and beat the Browns this week. 

5. Monday preview: Prepping you for Colts at Ravens

After a wild Week 5 that saw both the Browns and Bengals lose, the Ravens could take over sole possession of first place with a win. However, the Colts could also use a win and that’s because if they lose, they’ll be two full games behind the Titans in the AFC South race.   

My good buddy Jared Dubin wrote our deep-dive preview for this game here at CBSSports.com, and here’s how he sees the game playing out:

• Why the Colts can win: With two of their top offensive linemen out, it’s going to be imperative for the Colts to get their rushing attack going early. If Jonathan Taylor gets hot, not only will that take some pressure off of Carson Wentz, but it will also keep Lamar Jackson and the Ravens offense off the field. If the Colts are going to win, they’re likely going to need a monstrous game from Taylor.  
• Why the Ravens can win: If Lamar Jackson has proven one thing this year, it’s that he can absolutely throw the ball when the Ravens need him to, which is a good thing, because the Ravens are probably going to need him to throw the ball in this game. The Colts have struggled to stop the pass and if Jackson can take advantage of that, the Ravens will likely win by double digits. 

You can get a full preview of the game from Dubin by clicking here.

Dubin’s pick: Ravens 27-13 over Colts.

My pick: Ravens 31-23 over Colts.

If you’re thinking about betting on the game, Tyler Sullivan put together a full gambling preview. 

• ONE PROP TYLER LIKES: Lamar Jackson OVER 228.5 passing yards (-115): “Jackson has gone over this passing yards total in every game he’s played this season, and the Colts are allowing 8.4 passing yards per attempts this season, which ranks as the sixth-worst number in the NFL.”
• ONE PROP I LIKE: Carson Wentz OVER 1.5 passing touchdowns (+150): I’m not a huge fan of taking a Wentz prop here, but this prop offers a ton of value (To put the +150 in perspective, Lamar Jackson is at -105 for the same prop). Not only has Wentz thrown multiple touchdown passes in two of Indy’s four games, but he’ll be going up against a Ravens defense that has surrendered six TD passes on the season, which is tied for the fifth-most in the NFL. 
• Long shot prop I’m thinking about betting: First points of the game come on a Ravens field goal (+325). The Colts defense is good enough that I think they’ll be able to slow down Baltimore in the red zone and as we all know, the Ravens have Justin Tucker, so they won’t shy away from attempting a field goal. 

You can check out Sullivan’s full gambling preview by clicking here.

6. Rapid-fire roundup

It was a busy weekend in the NFL and since it’s nearly impossible to keep track of everything that happened, I went ahead and put together a roundup for you. 

• Jon Gruden email controversy continues. CBS Sports NFL Insider Jason La Canfora reported over the weekend that Gruden is now being investigated by the NFL for his email that used racist language to describe NFLPA executive director DeMaurice Smith. In a separate email, Gruden also used a vulgarity to describe Roger Goodell. 
• DeMaurice Smith to keep his job. On the same day Gruden’s emails leaked, Smith’s future was also up in the air. He needed 22 of 32 player representative votes to keep his job as NFLPA director and he got those votes on Friday, which means he’ll be sticking around until at least 2023.   
• NFL to Germany is almost a done deal. The NFL will almost certainly be holding a game in Germany in 2022. The only thing the league has to figure out is where to put the game. The three finalist cities to host the game will be announced tomorrow (Oct. 12). 
• JuJu Smith-Schuster could be out for the season. The Steelers receiver injured his shoulder on Sunday and it was bad enough that he’ll almost be certainly headed to injured reserve, according to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. Once on IR, a player can return after missing three games, but the Steelers are “fearful” that JuJu could end up missing the entire season. 
• Giants injuries piling up. Besides losing Daniel Jones to injury, the Giants also lost Saquon Barkley and Kenny Golladay. According to NFL.com, Barkley is week-to-week with a low-ankle sprain while the severity of Golladay’s (knee) won’t be known until today. 

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